Let's Play Ketchup (Catch Up)

I've decided to make some life changes.  I've been 29 for almost two months and it hit me. I need to get myself together FOR REAL.  It's time out for trying to fit in just for the sake of fitting in.  It's time for me to live the kind of life I want to live ... apologetically. 

 

I need to figure out: What makes me happy? What to do genuinely love doing?  What motivates me?  What is my passion?  What are my strengths?  What are my dealbreakers? What is are my weak areas?  How can I strengthen them?  What are my goals? 

 

Life is a gift and we only get one chance at it.  Nobody knows how much time they have. I don't want to look back and have a life full of regrets and missed opportunities. 

 

There some changes coming. 

 

I'm excited about them.

The Pity Party Is OVER

Some time has passed since I wrote my last post and I went back and forth with the notion of taking it down, but I want to be as real on here (my journal) as possible and all days aren't GOOD days. Some days I get down right depressed and unhappy with where I am in life. 

But the truth of the matter is that I'm blessed to be alive, and everyday that I am living is a chance for me to change my situation, to be who I want to be, and do what I want to do.

 

Sometimes it doesn't feel that way though.  I'm thankful for GOD putting people in my path to remind me that life is a journey.  There will be valleys along the way, BUT there will also be mountains.  Most often times, the mountains will be directly after being in a valley.  That is why it will seem so hard to move up.  The path down is easy.  There is nothing opposing you.  The travel upward will be much harder.  The gravity will fight you with every step.  In the end, you will be stronger and more grateful because of the effort and time that was put forth.  The reward will be greater.

 

Nothing worth having is easy or comes overnight.  Things will change.  Better days are ahead for me and for you.

Coffee and Reflections

Another year is upon us, and like the rest of the world, I've made some resolutions and promises to myself and a few others of things that I would like to change and improve in the up coming year. 

I'm not good at sticking to resolutions. I've never made it past more than a couple days when I've tried. My resolve hasn't been strong ... EVER. This year is different though. I'm about to embark on my last year in my 20s and I really want to prove to myself that I can be dedicated to something. That I can see something through. That I can witness results. 

So what's on my list? I'm glad you asked.

1.) Travel - I've got a few places in mind. I'm thinking Omaha < random I know but there is a castle there, and I would love to stay one night in a castle if that is available, Miami <my mama won a free cruise and I'm determined to tag along, Bahamas and Mexico <the destinations of the cruise, and lastly, if I can afford it, Las Vegas.

2.) Get in shape. Some of these places I want to travel will warrant wearing a bikini so I need to be bikini ready. Plus I want to feel more comfortable in my skin. I want to be healthier also.

3.) Have a stronger relationship with GOD. My faith has somehow taken a backseat to everything and I honestly think that is why I am having such a difficult time in every area right now.

I'm leaving 2014 in the past in beginning this year with no animosity or I'll will towards anyone. All things have been made new and I intend to have a great and prosperous year.  That is my prayer for whoever my style across this as well.

The Struggle Is Real

So ... It has been awhile again.  Honestly, I have no excuses for why I've been away this time other than I have just been BUSY.  Work has been taking up so much of my time that it seems as if I don't do anything but work.  I wish I had more of a life.  I wish was actually LIVING instead of merely being on earth taking up space.  Living is hard when you have responsibilities.  Before bills rolled into the equation, life was beautiful.

Lately I've struggling to find BALANCE. To find PEACE.  To have JOY and true happiness. Those things are important to ones quality of life though.  Those are the things that I am missing.

How do you go about regaining those things? How do you "Get to the happy"? 

I have goals and dreams. I have an idea of what I want out of life, but I don't have the first clue of how to go about making it happen.  I don't know how to live the life I want to live.  I just don't.  Maybe it is the fear of going out and striving for something and failing.  I know in my mind that failure is a part of life. I know that it makes you stronger and wiser. I know that failure isn't defeat, but simply a way of revealing to you where weaknesses in your plans are, BUT failure can also be disheartening.

This year, however, I am challenging myself to go for broke. I'm going to just step out there and see what happens. The what ifs and the shoulda, coulda, wouldas will not get the best of me any more.  I want more out of life. I want more for myself.  I think I might even surprise myself. 

We'll see ...

Have Ya Missed Me???

 

Life has a strange way of unfolding. It has been more than a year since I've updated my piece of the internet. I've been so engrossed with my lackluster being that I just haven't had the longing to blog. Nothing has been happening.  I've been working. I've been alive but I haven't LIVED in quite sometime. I have been maneuvering in this concrete jungle of the grown-up world and haven't been really enjoying myself ... my time, BUT that is all about to change. I'm determined to get out and starting getting my life on again.  I'm back!!

101 in 1001

So for the past couple of years I've started and stopped with thing called 101 in 1001. First let me explain what it is, 101 in 1001 is a list of 101 goals that a person is striving to do in 1001 days (2.75 years). Now more than ever I'm determined to complete this list that I have recently made for myself. I want to prove to myself that I can do anything that I set my mind to. So here is my new list so far:

1. Graduate from college with a Bacholor's Degree


2. Fully furnish my new apartment


3. Save $3,000 in my emergency fund


4. Visit St. Louis, Missouri


5. Visit Chicago, Illinois


6. Visit Miami, Florida


7. Visit Dallas, Texas


8. Go on a cruise


9. Paint my car


10. Eat at an expensive resturant


11. Visible four-pack when I laugh


12. Find a banging LBD ((little black dress))


13. Throw a dinner party


14. Attend a Super Bowl Party


15. Monica concert


16. Get a FULL health exam


17. Full sew in with the Winter


18. Beyonce concert


19. Get my car detailed with a carpet shampoo and all


20. Kevin Hart comedy show


21. Try the Italian resturant Buca's


22. Pay off all of my credit card debt


23. Go to a Royals baseball game


24. Learn to apply false eye lashes


25. Leave a $10 tip


26. Have a nice dinner for a special occasion


27. Visit my dad


28. Pay for my sister Senior costs ((pictures, prom ticket, etc))


29. Have a Spa Day with my family


30. Tank Concert


31. Go to an Event Alone


32. Approach a Guy


33. Rededicate My Life to GOD


34. Get a Pair of Shoes and the Matching Bag


35. Write a Novel


36. Read the Alchemist


37. Read Purpose Driven Life


38. Read Power of a Praying Woman


39. Essence Music Festival


40. Join a Sorority


41. Have a Picnic at the Nelson-Atkins Art Muesum Court Yard


42. Ride a Camel


43. Learn to Speak Spanish


44. Attend a Wine Tasting


45. Prepare a Steak Dinner


46. Speak Publicly


47. Ride the Metro Bus


48. Go to World's of Fun


49. Host a Movie Night


50. Host a Game Night


51. Volunteer


52. Attend a Bar-B-Que Contest


53. "Dance" in the Rain


54. Go to a Water Park

Well so far thats all I have so far. What are some of your short term goal for the upcoming year?

26 & Counting!!!

All praises due to God for letting me see another year. Last year, my life changed for the better.  I can't wait to experience the blessings that HE has in store for me this year.

New Me, New Life, New Blog

So much taken place in the last year or so that I've been M.I.A on my old blog, that I felt that it was only right to create a new one. The simple truth is, I'm not the same person that I was a year ago.  I've grown emotionally.  I've matured spiritally.  I've experienced life to a level that I would have never imagined for myself.  It would take a year to even try to catch people up to speed. Thus, I felt that it was time to start fresh. Leaving the old problems, disappointments, heart-breaks, and even some people back in the past and begining anew with a open mind, a clean heart, and a renewed spirit.